Hmm, where to begin?

While I watch all of the recaps, all of the memorial footage and shots of emotional people reliving that tragedy, I wonder what would have happened if Flight 93 had made it to the hijackers intended destination? Would we have a stand in president now? Would we continue to have such restrictions on our movements when we travel? Would Muslim Americans be viewed with sanctioned prejudice as if each one was a terrorist waiting to strike?

I don’t know about that, what I do know and remember vividly is the fear that Chicago could be on the list of places to hit, that the Sears Tower or the Hancock building could topple as the towers had that morning. What I thought of was everyone I knew who also worked downtown, of Eric a few blocks away working in another “symbol of America’s power”… all the what if’s as I struggled to get away from the campus and away from what could have become another Ground Zero in short order.

The last few years, I’ve been able to deal with this event as it usually has happened on a work day so I’ve been able to observe, remember and reflect in relative peace but this year marks 6 years since the travesty that changed how we think, act and behave in this country.

This is what I wrote once I was with Eric, and felt more or less safe from what happened that day.

Hey everybody,

Well, the title says it all. I am afraid for the loss of life, innocence and false security that we all harbor as we go about our daily routines.

I sit here now at my friends place, listening to Dan Rather speak on this tragedy and assault on America.

I would like to be at my desk now, listening to student complaints about classes they need and must have otherwise the world will end. Now, I wish I didn’t use that phrase so often. It now seems that the world is indeed ending or at least heading into a downward spiral into armegeddon.

Instead, I am here writing this to purge myself of the fear I have acquired within the last few hours. As I hear the news reports of destruction and death and hysteria within my home country, not in some remote location; but in New York, not far from here.Now, I feel terror.

How apt is it that the term used for the acts that have robbed me of my security as a person and as an American is terrorism. Because what I feel is terror, plain and simple.

It is so appropriate that we use that word. Since the Oklahoma bombing, the 1993 bombing of the World Trade Center, we have been living with the thinly veiled threat of terrorist actions.

This horrific day will remain with me for a very long time. I hate to say this, but for a long time, I will watch all those around me for signs of… actually I don’t know what I could look for.

Since we don’t know who exactly is behind this, it is unfair to point fingers at our ‘enemies’ and say you have done this. Yet it is equally disconcerting and equaly painful to see the news footage of children and adults cheering the attack on us.

Yes I deliberately used the term us. not US,but us. We are us and them is the party that would dare attack us like this, on a balmy September day when no one would expect it. There are theories floating around about the significance of the date, 9,11. Or 911 as in the emergency number for the US.

I dont know if that is true or not, I am not a politico, nor am I a conspiracy theorist by nature. I am skeptical, but right now, I am appalled, afraid and bloodthirsty for those who have perished in this attack.

Finally, I can say only this: Use this tragedy wisely. Use it as a wakeup call, a call to arms to realize the threat we live under at times, and to not be complacent in our assumed saftey.

Being American is not always a good thing people. That fact alone makes us a target, murderer.thief and enslaver of the world to so many others, except us.

The mirror looks two ways, take a peek now and see who is looking at you. And realize what other people of the world may be seeing you as.

Peace and Love to all my fellow people.